A Valentine's Day Post

Every year, this holiday rolls up and I find myself again and again pretending it isn't so. Pretending that this day isn't really coming up and I am still single. I avoid the grocery stores like the plague because of the nausea that screams in my face the second I walk through the doors. The commercials and radio advertisements and all the reminders that Valentine's Day is happening is so loud I can't go an hour without being reminded it is coming.

This year, I am seeking the Lord to teach me about what it means to surrender my hopes, dreams and life to Him. To the author of the world and the giver of life - to Love Himself. I knew that in order to have a good attitude today, I needed to not be at my house by myself. So, I decided earlier this week that I needed to go on a hike with Jesus - that is where I sense his presence closest with me. When I can tune out the noise of this world, the lies that try and creep their way into my mind, thoughts and heart. I put on my earbuds and turned up my worship music and we took a hike. Just after I got started this song came on - Good to be Alive - I started singing along and knew it was going to be a good day! Look it up - it's a good one!

I made it to the top and found a cozy spot and pulled out my Bible. I am working on reading the Bible through chronologically and it is FASCINATING. If you haven't read the Bible through this way - start now! Every time I read through there is something new and this time things are jumping off the page at me and I am so in love with the God who created all of this.

I am currently in 2 Samuel; 1 Chronicles and the Psalms. It is neat to see David's prayers in the Psalms as he leads the Israelites through to the Promised Land. Each time a new nation comes up to conquer, the Israelites say, 'No way. God can't do this. We must return to Egypt.' They overtly disobey and don't trust the God who PROMISED them to get to the Promised Land. I feel like I am so quick to have the same attitude. I know God has given me more than I ever could possibly deserve, yet I have moments where I doubt His leading in my life. I want to be married someday and have my own family, that isn't happening yet and I so quickly fall into the same trap as the Israelites - believing that I can do better myself - failing to recognize all that God has given me. In this weeks reading, I came across Psalm 84:10-12.

"For a day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere. I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of wickedness. For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly. O Lord of hosts, blessed is the one who trusts in you!"

So many times I have seen this verse be taken out of it's context to be given as encouragement to people that God will give you something good. It is a pretty powerful statement, but when we read it in the order that it happened, Israel is turning their back, going from one sin to another, not trusting in the Father, then seeing Him provide and protect for them. When I read this passage this week, in this context, I was stunned. There is SO much power behind that. Even when we fail to trust completely, when we think we can do better than God Himself, he will bring us back, forgive us and give us His blessing and His goodness. What an amazing God!

At the top of the mountain today I got to witness an engagement. A young couple came to the top and I could tell the young man looked nervous. He was fidgeting and looking around - he looked at me and smiled and I knew what he was about to do. He got down on one knee...gave her a little speech then pulled out a little black box. My heart was beaming with love knowing that I was getting to experience this moment with this couple. Though I still dream of the day that some man might get down on his knee to ask to spend the rest of my life with him, I was reminded that God has already done that for me. That kind of love, that full commitment, the ALL in kind of love. Jesus did that for me when I asked Him to forgive me of my sins and to be my Savior. And, even better, earthly promises say, 'till death do us part.' My love with Jesus isn't that at all. It is at death that we will truly be united - with no fears, questions, or tears - I like that part!

Tonight, I am going to bed in awe of God's steadfast love for me. He is the one that loves us fully, perfectly and unconditionally. I am so thankful for this kind of love and that we get to experience a small taste of this love on earth. So my friends, enjoy this day. Celebrate with the ones whom God has brought into your life and thank Him first and foremost for each of those people and for the fact that He gave His life so we could live forever with Him. That is a love we will never understand!

Jesus, help me to walk uprightly and trust you completely!  

You can see the couple there - just to the right - just after they got engaged. Blessings on your marriage, strangers! :)